And I claim I'm not excited with my life anymore. So I blame this town, this job, these friends.. The truth is its myself. And I'm trying to understand myself, and pinpoint where I am. But by the time I get things figured out, I've changed the whole damn plan.
These past few months have been centered around college, GPA, and work. I don't know how much more I can humanly take. I feel like I've lost track of so much, and it's as though I'm the only person in the world who has no clue. I want to run to my mother and tell her I'm afraid. When I did this as a kid, she would always look deep inside me and say what translates to something like "You will fly your birds soon and a kind hand will hold your empty hand."
So much I have taken for granted. Have you ever asked yourself, what is it that truly makes you happy? What makes you smile, what illuminates your life? So far I've narrowed it down to a few things:
1. Cameron Sutherland
2. honesty and kept promises
3. free time- you never know how much it's worth until it's gone
4. people who remember my birthday without the help of facebook
I want power in my words. I want passion in my eyes.
Just you, me, and the sun..
originally written January 14, 2009