Saturday, November 17, 2012

...And Then There's Me

I stood in the storm for years and told myself I didn't mind.
I closed my purple eyes and left every dream of mine behind.

I'm scared, I'm fucking scared. My everything is full of doubt. My family, my friends, nothing is unconditional.  Even love is a temporary contract.  The things I want most I have no confidence in. They say I'm not alone but I feel that I am, I know I am.  I was dealt a hand I didn't understand.  So I ache, I agonize and I'm silent in my ways.  I give up, I decorate my own soul in defeat instead of waiting for someone to bring me flowers.

Then you whispered, not into my ear, but into my heart.  And then you kissed me, not on my lips, but my soul.  Suddenly the ground shook and in you, I found it.

When I'm with you, it's different.  I feel strong and capable. I know who I am and that person is worth happiness.  I walk beside you and I have everything I need, everything I want.  Air in my lungs, love in my eyes, a future I never thought possible.  You yourself are unconditional, priceless.  And you move me in a delicate manner, to be better, to work harder, to do with hope what I've done for years. To live, not just endure. 

You set me free.  Like the grace of a woman, not the grief of a child.  There are no words, I am so utterly grateful.

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